Baby in Belly – over half way there!
It has been a while since my post Baby in Belly. It is hard for me to believe that I am already past half way. (I started this post when I was around half way there and haven’t finished the post until now.)
I finally have a belly that indicates there truly is a baby in there. I feel wonderful, energized, full of love and life. I don’t want this to end!
Henry wanted his own belly shot.
I have wanted to be excited about this fourth baby since the beginning and to tell the whole world. But sometimes life can take a turn that you don’t expect and then there could be heart-break. I wasn’t ready or willing to have my heart-broken. I have this wonderful mechanism that helps me to be excited secretly but still not get my hopes up, I guess this is a nice way of saying denial. Since this baby will complete My Dream Come True story I wanted to make sure he/she was here to stay before I shared my news with everyone.
Side note: With every pregnancy I have this time period of denial, not because I didn’t want that pregnancy to happen. Because I was dying for it to happen! It is hard for me to believe when it actually does happened because I have waited a long time for each of my precious babies. When I finally get a positive home pregnancy test I still can’t believe it (that is why I buy them in two packs). If I am remembering correctly I used three home pregnancy tests at the beginning of my pregnancy with Charlie. I know my non-existent menstrual period should also be an indicator, that just isn’t good enough!
I had my typical morning sickness hit during the same week as my past pregnancies and like clock work it arrived at the same time of day – 3:00 in the afternoon and it lasted until about 8:00 PM. This went on for two months or so and disappeared around the same time it did with the other three boys. I felt like my morning sickness was a little harder this time. Due to the fact that we have three boys running around, I had to go on with my daily jobs and still feed everyone. The tasks of thinking of meals, cooking them and eating them were not things I could accomplish very easily. I had no appetite; no energy and feeling nauseated made it difficult for me to keep up with my garden, cooking meals, after school activities and our evening routine. I remember one of my most challenging days was when I rested on the couch for four hours not being able to find enough energy to move or get up. I loved it at least that is what I kept telling myself. The thought of this baby still growing inside of me made that day and other days bearable. I never complained. I have enjoyed every minute of this pregnancy since I accepted the fact that I am pregnant.
I feel brave to admit that this is my best pregnancy. Or maybe because it is my last pregnancy and I am enjoying every second. The things that are making it the best are: the wisdom I have gained from the previous three pregnancies, I have three little boys and a great husband to share this with, I have two wonderful midwives that I love and trust, a great family doctor who agrees that it is okay to have a baby at home, I will be attempting my second home birth, I am not taking any medications or shots and my belly is beautiful and free of bruises (the heparin shots caused bruises that ranged in the size of a dime to a fifty cent piece).
There are days that I forget that I am growing a baby. Those are the days that I stay up too late with friends, blogging, reading, and sewing or work hard with out sitting down to rest until I am completely wiped out.
Then there are days I am reminded frequently that we really are going to have a new baby in our house this spring: strangers have started making comments about my belly, my family and friends are starting to touch my belly and talk to the baby, the boys are always touching, hugging and kissing my belly, my belly gets hot when I am cooking on the stove, and wet when I am doing the dishes, and I no longer fit in my button and zipper pants. Finally I am feeling those wonderful fluttering movements on the inside. The movements are getting stronger and more frequent with each new day.
April still seems so far away. I am getting very excited about the things that will happen at our house this spring:
- Spring time skiing is my absolute favorite thing to do! (according to Charlie all you need is your bathrobe and a fleece jacket.)
I won’t be carrying Henry on my back this year.
- Making firewood. My great-grandmother split firewood into her 90s, so why can’t I do it while pregnant and in my 40s? I can only hope that I will still be splitting firewood in my 90s.
(These are photos just days before Henry was born)
Getting kisses in the woods from my boys while taking a rest from making firewood.
- Coloring Easter eggs with just three boys.
- Having a home birth with these two wonderful midwives, Christie and Jane (In the Beginning Midwives).
- Giving birth to a happy and healthy baby that weighs less than nine pounds!
- Holding my precious new baby while watching the three big boys build barns with their blocks and train tracks in my living room. Or maybe they will be wrestling and I will have to send them outside. (Henry – two days old)
- Being able to eat/drink my favorite things. I have started a list of things I want to eat/drink (of course not at one time): pumpkin pie, pumpkin bars, my carrot cake with cream cheese frosting, my mom’s cheesecake, cinnamon rolls, frozen mini snickers bars, Sunny Caramels, caramel and cashews on ice cream or the best caramel cashew frozen custard from Kopps in Milwaukee, and drinking my favorite beers – Guinness, Shine On, Mud Puppy Porter and maybe I would like to have one of Jack’s bourbon and Cokes because they smell so good to me right now.
- Seeing flowers again.
Jack’s Aunt Bonnie told me when I was pregnant with Robbie, “Enjoy it now. When they are on the inside that is when babies are the easiest to take care of.” I agreed with her. Although I didn’t really understand the truth of her comment until Robbie was born and wished he went back inside until he was ready to come out a little happier.
I am not going to rush this winter season or this pregnancy. I am going to love every day we have snow on the ground. I just wish enough snow would arrive so we can start skiing! I will cross-country ski as much as possible. I will continue to love every minute of this pregnancy and wait patiently for this baby to arrive.